| Iowa Cubs
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Posted 2010 April 26
Last year, I did reviews for the Danville Braves, Gwinnett
Braves, Mississippi Braves, and Rome Braves. Or perhaps I should say I
did a review for those four teams, given the fact that I did nothing
more that take the same review and modify a few bits here and there. I
did this because quite frankly, I didn't see why I should be putting a
lot of effort into each team's review when no one put a lot of effort
into each team's logo.
With the Daytona Cubs and the Iowa Cubs, the situation is not
so bad. First of all, the Chicago Cubs have only two farm teams using
their name. Second, I don't think the Chicago Cubs actually own either
of them, whereas the Atlanta Braves empire does own all the farm teams
using their name. Third, one of the two farm teams called the Cubs
doesn't use Chicago's logo in any way except for having the same
colors.
This, of course, is the team that does use Chicago's logo.
Originally, I think, they were just going to use the exact same logo and
be done with it. But then at the last moment, someone got worried that
people might confuse Des Moines with Chicago (not bloody likely). So to
differentiate the teams, that someone grabbed a blue magic marker and
scribbled "Iowa" over the logo. And that, my friends, is how the Iowa
Cubs logo got created. At least, that's my version of the story.
I'm not certain why people are borrowing the Cubs name. I mean, the
Chicago Cubs are hardly a tradition of excellence, now, are they? I
understand the Scranton Wilkes-Barre Yankees. They're telling you that
they're proud to be the AAA affiliate for the winningest baseball team
in major league history. The New York Yankees are one of those teams
where even if you hate them (and believe me, I do), you have to respect
them. The Cubs? Not so much. The Iowa Cubs are telling you that
they're proud to be the AAA affiliate for the team that holds the
longest championship drought in all of North American sports, at one
hundred and two years and counting.
The other problem with using the Cubs name is that it just isn't a good
name. Now, as I said yesterday, I know that baseball fans are required
to sign a contract that says they'll pretend otherwise, but journalistic
integrity requires that I violate that clause and come out and say it.
The name Cubs just su— HEY! WHO LET YOU IN HERE?! GET OUT OF
MY HOU— PUT ME DOWN THIS INSTANT YOU JACKBOOTED MMMMMF! MMMMF HMMM
MMMM FMMM! MMMMMF MMMMF—
Final Score: 86 points.
Penalties: Region (egregious), 17 pts; Script, 7 pts; Offspring, 12 pts;
Diamond, 16 pts; Letter, 24 pts; Name, 10 pts.
Bonuses: None
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