Teams with asterisks are not yet posted

Aberdeen IronBirds*
Acereros del Norte
Águila de Veracruz*
Aigles de Trois-Rivières
Akron RubberDucks
Albuquerque Isotopes
Algodoneros de Unión Laguna
Altoona Curve
Amarillo Sod Poodles
Arkansas Travelers
Asheville Tourists
Augusta GreenJackets
Beloit Snappers
Billings Mustangs
Biloxi Shuckers
Binghamton Rumble Ponies
Birmingham Barons
Boise Hawks
Bowie Baysox
Bowling Green Hot Rods
Bradenton Marauders
Bravos de León
Brooklyn Cyclones
Buffalo Bisons
Capitales de Quebec
Carolina Mudcats
Cedar Rapids Kernels
Charleston Dirty Birds*
Charleston RiverDogs
Charlotte Knights
Chattanooga Lookouts
Chicago Dogs
Clearwater Threshers
Cleburne Railroaders
Columbia Fireflies
Columbus Clippers
Corpus Christi Hooks
Dayton Dragons
Daytona Tortugas
Delmarva Shorebirds
Diablos Rojos del México
Down East Wood Ducks
Dunedin Blue Jays
Durham Bulls
El Paso Chihuahuas
Erie SeaWolves
Eugene Emeralds
Evansville Otters*
Everett AquaSox
Fargo-Moorhead RedHawks
Fayetteville Woodpeckers
Florence Y'Alls
Fort Myers Mighty Mussels
Fort Wayne TinCaps
Fredericksburg Nationals*
Fresno Grizzlies
Frisco RoughRiders
Frontier Greys*
Gary SouthShore RailCats
Gastonia Honey Hunters
Gateway Grizzlies
Generales de Durango
Glacier Range Riders*
Grand Junction Rockies
Great Falls Voyagers
Great Lakes Loons
Greensboro Grasshoppers
Greenville Drive
Guerreros de Oaxaca
Gwinnett Stripers
Harrisburg Senators
Hartford Yard Goats
Hickory Crawdads
High Point Rockers
Hillsboro Hops
Hudson Valley Renegades
Idaho Falls Chukars
Indianapolis Indians
Inland Empire 66ers of San

Iowa Cubs
Jacksonville Jumbo Shrimp
Jersey Shore BlueClaws*
Joliet Slammers
Jupiter Hammerheads
Kane County Cougars*
Kannapolis Cannon Ballers
Kansas City Monarchs
Lake County Captains
Lake Country Dockhounds*
Lake Elsinore Storm
Lake Erie Crushers
Lakeland Flying Tigers
Lancaster Barnstormers
Lansing Lugnuts
Las Vegas Aviators
Lehigh Valley IronPigs
Leones de Yucatán
Lexington Legends
Lincoln Saltdogs
Long Island Ducks
Louisville Bats
Lynchburg Hillcats
Mariachis de Guadalajara
Memphis Redbirds
Midland RockHounds*
Milwaukee Milkmen
Mississippi Braves
Missoula Paddleheads*
Modesto Nuts
Montgomery Biscuits
Myrtle Beach Pelicans
Nashville Sounds*
New Hampshire Fisher Cats
New Jersey Jackals*
New York Boulders
Norfolk Tides
Northern Colorado Owlz
Northwest Arkansas Naturals
Ogden Raptors
Oklahoma City Dodgers
Olmecas de Tabasco
Omaha Storm Chasers
Ottawa Titans*
Palm Beach Cardinals
Pensacola Blue Wahoos
Peoria Chiefs
Pericos de Puebla
Piratas de Campeche
Portland Sea Dogs
Quad City River Bandits
Rancho Cucamonga Quakes
Reading Fightin Phils
Reno Aces
Richmond Flying Squirrels
Rieleros de Aguascalientes
Rochester Red Wings
Rocket City Trash Pandas*
Rocky Mountain Vibes
Rome Braves
Round Rock Express
Sacramento River Cats
Salem Red Sox
Salt Lake Bees
San Antonio Missions
San Jose Giants
Saraperos de Saltillo
Schaumburg Boomers
Scranton/Wilkes-Barre RailRiders
Sioux City Explorers
Sioux Falls Canaries
Somerset Patriots
South Bend Cubs
Southern Maryland Blue Crabs
Spokane Indians
Springfield Cardinals
St. Lucie Mets
St. Paul Saints
Staten Island Ferry Hawks*
Stockton Ports
Sugar Land Skeeters
Sultanes de Monterrey
Sussex County Miners
Syracuse Mets*
Tacoma Rainiers
Tampa Tarpons*
Tecolotes de los Dos Laredos*
Tennessee Smokies
Tigres de Quintana Roo
Toledo Mud Hens
Toros de Tijuana
Trenton Thunder
Tri-City Dust Devils
Tri-City ValleyCats
Vancouver Canadians
Visalia Rawhide
Washington Wild Things
West Michigan Whitecaps
Wichita Wind Surge
Wild Health Genomes*
Wilmington Blue Rocks
Windy City Thunderbolts
Winnipeg Goldeyes*
Winston-Salem Dash*
Wisconsin Timber Rattlers
Worcester Red Sox*
York Revolution
Beloit Snappers 163

Notice: All logos on this page are included within the parameters of 17 U.S.C. § 107, which states that the reproduction of a copyrighted work for purposes of criticism and/or comment is not an infringement of copyright. No challenge to the copyrights of these logos is intended by their inclusion here.
Posted 2009 June 14

As I write this, the Wikipedia entry for Beloit includes the following sentences: "Beloit is the home of Beloit College. It is also home to a Hormel plant, a Frito Lay plant, the world's largest can of chili, and the Beloit Snappers baseball club of the Midwest League." Man, that's cold. I can understand playing second fiddle to the college in town; indeed, I think that shows a proper perspective in the world. I don't quite understand putting the baseball team in line behind the food plants, unless those are the companies' largest plants or something, but I suppose it makes sense in a sort of "business before pleasure" way. But no matter how you spin it, being deemed less important than a can of chili is just harsh.

(The so-called world's largest can of chili, incidentally, almost certainly isn't. First of all, it apparently is just a circular tower painted to look like a can of chili. But more importantly, the "label" clearly indicates that it is chili with beans, and any fool knows real chili doesn't have beans.)

When I first started writing this review, the "chili" joke in that last paragraph was going to segue into a discussion of the logo and the turtle in the logo, but I can't do it. If you look to the right you will see why. Here we have a close-up of the turtle. I can honestly say I have never in my life reacted to a logo in this way. I feel genuinely sorry for this turtle. That's not some exaggeration being made to set up a joke. I genuinely, sincerely feel sympathy for this turtle. I feel so sorry for him that I just deleted the paragraph I had written which had my usual jokes about the logo's appearance. The jokes in that paragraph seemed cruel, and I just couldn't bring myself to keep them.

How could I not feel sorry for this guy? He clearly seems to have been drawn in a way intended to elicit sympathy. Between the oversized pupils, the lowered eyebrows, and the clenched teeth (the curved line by the edge of the mouth even makes it look like his jaw is quivering), it really looks like the poor guy is about to burst into tears. He looks like the little kid during P.E. who'd much rather go off on his own and read a book or climb a tree, but instead he has to play softball with the rest of the class, and everyone's making fun of him and he's absolutely miserable. He looks, in other words, like I felt during most of junior high school. The last thing I would have needed at age thirteen would have been some smart-ass adult pointing out why I wasn't a very good logo for a sports team. So I'm not going to say anything mean about this guy. I simply refuse. I will not do it.

Who I will make fun of is the guy who designed this logo. What the hell were you thinking? How many times do I have to say this? Make the logo look imposing! Is that really such a hard concept? Imposiog logos get your fans and your players pumped up. And when I'm feeling sympathy toward the character you have drawn, you have failed to make the logo look imposing. You have failed on a monumental level. My reaction to a logo is not supposed to be pity. My reaction to a logo is not supposed to be a desire to offer it an encouraging word. Most of all, my reaction to a logo is not supposed to be being reminded of a miserable time in my life. If I lived in Beloit, rest assured that I would never go to a Snappers game simply because I'd get depressed from looking at the logo. Hell, if there were too many billboards for the team in town, I might even move. And I could be wrong, but I'd bet that there are people who live (or used to live) in Beloit who feel the same way about it that I do. And you know what, Mr. Designer: It's all your fault. You're costing your clients money, Mr. Designer. More than that, Mr. Designer, you're costing the town of Beloit tax revenue because you're unnecessarily lowering its population with your crummy logo. And that's a mistake no matter how you slice it.

Final Score: 163 points.
Penalties: Script, 7 pts; Diamond, 16 pts; Humanoid, 30 pts; Cartoon, 47 pts; Player, 51 pts; Logo, 12 pts. Bonuses: None.

This page Copyright ©2009 Scott D. Rhodes. All rights reserved