Teams with asterisks are not yet posted

Aberdeen IronBirds
Acereros del Norte*
Águila de Veracruz*
Aigles de Trois-Rivieres*
Akron RubberDucks
Albuquerque Isotopes
Alexandria Aces*
Algodoneros de Unión Laguna*
Altoona Curve
Amarillo Sod Poodles
Arkansas Travelers
Asheville Tourists
Augusta GreenJackets
Bay Area Toros*
Beloit Snappers
Billings Mustangs
Biloxi Shuckers
Binghamton Rumble Ponies*
Birmingham Barons
Boise Hawks
Bowie Baysox
Bowling Green Hot Rods
Bradenton Marauders
Bravos de León
Brooklyn Cyclones
Buffalo Bisons
Capitales de Quebec
Carolina Mudcats
Cedar Rapids Kernels
Charleston RiverDogs
Charlotte Knights*
Chattanooga Lookouts
Clearwater Threshers
Cleburne Railroaders*
Columbia Fireflies*
Columbus Clippers
Connecticut Tigers
Corpus Christi Hooks
Dayton Dragons
Daytona Tortugas
Delmarva Shorebirds
Diablos Rojos del México
Down East Wood Ducks*
Dunedin Blue Jays
Durham Bulls
Erie SeaWolves
Eugene Emeralds
Evansville Otters
Everett AquaSox
Fayetteville Woodpeckers*
Fargo-Moorhead RedHawks
Fayetteville Astros*
Florence Freedom
Fort Myers Mighty Mussels*
Fort Wayne TinCaps
Frederick Keys
Fredericksburg Nationals*
Fresno Grizzlies*
Frisco RoughRiders
Gary SouthShore RailCats
Gastonia Honey Hunters*
Gateway Grizzlies
Generales de Durango*
Grand Junction Rockies
Great Falls Voyagers
Great Lakes Loons
Greensboro Grasshoppers
Greenville Drive
Guerreros de Oaxaca
Gwinnett Stripers*
Harrisburg Senators
Hartford Yard Goats*
Hickory Crawdads
High Point Rockers
Hillsboro Hops
Houston Apollos*
Hudson Valley Renegades*
Idaho Falls Chukars
Indianapolis Indians
Inland Empire 66ers*
Iowa Cubs
Jackson Generals
Jacksonville Jumbo Shrimp*
Joliet Slammers
Jupiter Hammerheads
Kane County Cougars
Kannapolis Cannon Ballers*
Kansas City T-Bones*
Lake County Captains
Lake Elsinore Storm
Lake Erie Crushers
Lakeland Flying Tigers
Lakewood BlueClaws
Lancaster Barnstormers
Lancaster JetHawks
Lansing Lugnuts
Laredo Lemurs
Las Vegas 51s
Lehigh Valley IronPigs
Leones de Yucatán
Lexington Legends*
Lincoln Saltdogs
Long Beach Armada*
Long Island Ducks
Louisville Bats
Lowell Spinners*
Lynchburg Hillcats*
Mariachis de Guadalajara*
Memphis Redbirds
Midland RockHounds
Milwaukee Milkmen*
Mississippi Braves
Missoula Paddleheads*
Mobile BayBears
Modesto Nuts
Montgomery Biscuits
Myrtle Beach Pelicans
Nashville Sounds*
New Hampshire Fisher Cats
New Jersey Jackals*
New Orleans Baby Cakes
New York Boulders
Norfolk Tides
Normal CornBelters
Northern Colorado Owlz* Northwest Arkansas Naturals
Norwich Sea Unicorns*
Ogden Raptors*
Oklahoma City Dodgers
Olmecas de Tabasco*
Omaha Storm Chasers
Palm Beach Cardinals
Pensacola Blue Wahoos
Peoria Chiefs
Pericos de Puebla
Piratas de Campeche
Portland Sea Dogs
Potros de Tijuana*
Quad City River Bandits
Rancho Cucamonga Quakes
Reading Fightin Phils
Reno Aces
Richmond Flying Squirrels
Rieleros de Aguascalientes
Rochester Red Wings
Rocky Mountain Vibes
Rome Braves
Round Rock Express
Sacramento River Cats
Salem Red Sox
Salt Lake Bees
San Antonio Missions
San Jose Giants
Saraperos de Saltillo
Sarasota Reds*
Schaumburg Boomers
Scranton/Wilkes-Barre RailRiders*
Sioux City Explorers
Sioux Falls Canaries
Somerset Patriots
Sonoma Stompers
South Bend Cubs
Southern Illinois Miners
Southern Maryland Blue Crabs
Spokane Indians
Springfield Cardinals
St. Lucie Mets
St. Paul Saints*
Stockton Ports
Sugar Land Skeeters
Sultanes de Monterrey*
Sussex County Miners*
Syracuse Chiefs
Tacoma Rainiers*
Tampa Tarpons*
Tecolotes de los Dos Laredos*
Tennessee Smokies*
Texarkana Gunslingers*
Tigres de Quintana Roo
Toledo Mud Hens
Toros de Tijuana*
Traverse City Beach Bums
Trenton Thunder
Tri-City Dust Devils
Tri-City ValleyCats
Tucson Padres
Tulsa Drillers
Vallejo Admirals*
Vancouver Canadians
Visalia Rawhide
Washington Wild Things
West Michigan Whitecaps
Wichita Wind Surge*
Wilmington Blue Rocks
West Virginia Power
Windy City Thunderbolts
Winnipeg Goldeyes
Winston-Salem Dash*
Wisconsin Timber Rattlers
Worcester Red Sox*
York Revolution
Charlotte Stone Crabs 38

Notice: All logos on this page are included within the parameters of 17 U.S.C. § 107, which states that the reproduction of a copyrighted work for purposes of criticism and/or comment is not an infringement of copyright. No challenge to the copyrights of these logos is intended by their inclusion here.
Posted 2014 June 8

I'm spending too much time, metaphorically and literally, in Florida this year. First of all, this is my third review of a Florida team this year, meaning I've reviewed more baseball teams in Florida this year than in the previous five years combined. Second, I actually spent a week in Florida back in April. I was visiting my parents, who (as I've mentioned in a previous review) have moved to Florida because apparently North Carolina isn't hot enough. And after spending just under a week in Florida, I find myself asking one simple question:

Why does anyone want to live in Florida?

Perhaps I should explain that I think North Carolina is too hot. My wife and I generally take our vacations in August, and we generally go way the hell up north because we need to escape the heat. We've been to the Finger Lakes a few times, the mountains of Virginia a couple of times, Maine once, Montana once, and Washington D.C. once. How many times have we gone south for a vaction? Not once. At least, not until it became the only way to see my parents. My parents, it should be noted, love Florida. I think they're crazy. I know they're crazy, if only because raising me and my brother would destroy anyone's sanity.

Temperature isn't the only issue. We were close to the Gulf, so the tap water was hopelessly brackish-tasting. (Few drinks have ever been as delicious to me as the water from the fountain in the Atlanta airport on the way home; I think the last time I enjoyed a drink so thoroughly was when I got to taste some bourbon that cost about $350 a bottle.) And do you think North Carolina is humid? The Mariana Trench is probably less humid than Florida. And there are alligators all over the damn place. Maybe it's just me, but when I see as many alligators as I saw in Florida, I take that as Mother Nature's way of telling me that humans should not be living nearby.

Now, to be fair, I did enjoy the trip. I enjoyed getting to see my parents, of course. Also, we got to visit some fairly nifty places like the Naples Zoo and the Edison/Ford Winter Estates (as in Thomas Edison and Henry Ford; they were next-door neighbors). One evening we got to watch the sun set over the Gulf, and there were a couple of dolphins swimming around under the pier. And I enjoyed seeing the alligators. I just don't want to live near them. I guess what I'm saying is that Florida is, as the old cliché goes, a nice place to visit but I wouldn't want to live there. And I really don't understand why anyone else does.

I could, I suppose, just ask my parents why they want to live in Florida, but I can't think of a way to ask "Is the fact that you're happy down here proof that you're insane?" without it sounding insulting. A loving son should not insult one's parents by calling them insane. This is especially true if one is culpable in that insanity.

We were, for the record, not too far from Port Charlotte, where the Charlotte Stone Crabs play ("Charlotte" is actually the name of the county in this instance), although we never made it quite that far north. I would have liked to have seen a game while I was down there, but we were busy doing other things, and let's face it, I can see baseball here in North Carolina. Okay, let's just be honest: I dropped the hint that I wouldn't mind taking in a game and everyone else responded by dropping a hint that they had zero interest.

Since this is ostensibly a logo review, I should probably mention the logo at least briefly. It's, uh, a stone crab. The crab is not colored accurately (actual stone crabs are reddish brown); instead, the team uses the same colors as its parent team, the Tampa Bay Rays. The crab has eyes with visible whites, which is sort of odd, and made even odder by the fact that the whites are yellow. Aside from that, however, it's your basic stylized drawing of a crab. No muss, no fuss. There's really only one problem with this logo, which is that if you want to see it on a jersey you have to go to Florida during the spring or summer. And that would be insane. And since you're not my parents and didn't have to put up with me and my brother for sixteen years, you have no excuse for being insane.

Final Score: 38 points.
Penalties: Region, 8 pts; Humanoid, 30 pts.
Bonuses: None.

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