Teams with asterisks are not yet posted

Aberdeen IronBirds*
Acereros del Norte
Águila de Veracruz
Aigles de Trois-Rivières
Akron RubberDucks
Albuquerque Isotopes
Algodoneros de Unión Laguna
Altoona Curve
Amarillo Sod Poodles
Arkansas Travelers
Asheville Tourists
Augusta GreenJackets
Beloit Sky Carp*
Billings Mustangs
Biloxi Shuckers
Binghamton Rumble Ponies
Birmingham Barons
Boise Hawks
Bowie Baysox
Bowling Green Hot Rods
Bradenton Marauders
Bravos de León
Brooklyn Cyclones
Buffalo Bisons
Capitales de Quebec
Carolina Mudcats
Cedar Rapids Kernels
Charleston Dirty Birds
Charleston RiverDogs
Charlotte Knights
Charros de Jalisco*
Chattanooga Lookouts
Chicago Dogs
Clearwater Threshers
Cleburne Railroaders
Columbia Fireflies
Columbus Clippers
Conspiradores de Querétaro*
Corpus Christi Hooks
Dayton Dragons
Daytona Tortugas
Delmarva Shorebirds
Diablos Rojos del México
Dorados de Chihuahua*
Down East Wood Ducks
Dunedin Blue Jays
Durham Bulls
El Paso Chihuahuas
Empire State Greys*
Erie SeaWolves
Eugene Emeralds
Evansville Otters*
Everett AquaSox
Fargo-Moorhead RedHawks
Fayetteville Woodpeckers
Florence Y'Alls
Fort Myers Mighty Mussels
Fort Wayne TinCaps
Fredericksburg Nationals
Fresno Grizzlies
Frisco RoughRiders
Gary SouthShore RailCats
Gastonia Baseball Club*
Gateway Grizzlies
Generales de Durango
Glacier Range Riders
Grand Junction Jackalopes
Great Falls Voyagers
Great Lakes Loons*
Greensboro Grasshoppers*
Greenville Drive
Guerreros de Oaxaca
Gwinnett Stripers
Hagerstown Flying Boxcars*
Harrisburg Senators
Hartford Yard Goats
Hickory Crawdads
High Point Rockers
Hillsboro Hops
Hudson Valley Renegades
Idaho Falls Chukars
Indianapolis Indians
Inland Empire 66ers of San

Iowa Cubs
Jacksonville Jumbo Shrimp
Jersey Shore BlueClaws*
Joliet Slammers
Jupiter Hammerheads
Kannapolis Cannon Ballers
Kansas City Monarchs
Lake County Captains
Lake Country DockHounds
Lake Elsinore Storm
Lake Erie Crushers
Lakeland Flying Tigers
Lancaster Stormers*
Lansing Lugnuts
Las Vegas Aviators
Lehigh Valley IronPigs
Leones de Yucatán
Lexington Legends
Lincoln Saltdogs*
Long Island Ducks
Louisville Bats
Lynchburg Hillcats
Memphis Redbirds
Midland RockHounds
Milwaukee Milkmen
Mississippi Braves
Missoula Paddleheads
Modesto Nuts
Montgomery Biscuits
Myrtle Beach Pelicans
Nashville Sounds
New England Knockouts*
New Hampshire Fisher Cats
New Jersey Jackals
New York Boulders
Norfolk Tides
Northern Colorado Owlz
Northwest Arkansas Naturals*
Oakland Ballers
Ogden Raptors
Oklahoma City Baseball Club*
Olmecas de Tabasco
Omaha Storm Chasers
Ottawa Titans
Palm Beach Cardinals
Pensacola Blue Wahoos
Peoria Chiefs
Pericos de Puebla
Piratas de Campeche
Portland Sea Dogs
Quad City River Bandits
Rancho Cucamonga Quakes
Reading Fightin Phils
Reno Aces
Richmond Flying Squirrels
Rieleros de Aguascalientes
Rochester Red Wings
Rocket City Trash Pandas
Rocky Mountain Vibes
Rome Emperors*
Round Rock Express
Sacramento River Cats
Salem Red Sox
Salt Lake Bees
San Antonio Missions
San Jose Giants
Saraperos de Saltillo
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Spokane Indians
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Stockton Ports
Sugar Land Skeeters
Sultanes de Monterrey
Sussex County Miners*
Syracuse Mets
Tacoma Rainiers
Tampa Tarpons
Tecolotes de los Dos Laredos
Tennessee Smokies
Tigres de Quintana Roo
Toledo Mud Hens
Toros de Tijuana
Tri-City Dust Devils
Tri-City ValleyCats
Vancouver Canadians
Visalia Rawhide
Washington Wild Things
West Michigan Whitecaps
Wichita Wind Surge
Wilmington Blue Rocks
Windy City Thunderbolts
Winnipeg Goldeyes
Winston-Salem Dash
Wisconsin Timber Rattlers
Worcester Red Sox*
Yolo High Wheelers
York Revolution
El Paso Chihuahuas 30

Notice: All logos on this page are included within the parameters of 17 U.S.C. § 107, which states that the reproduction of a copyrighted work for purposes of criticism and/or comment is not an infringement of copyright. No challenge to the copyrights of these logos is intended by their inclusion here.
Posted 2021 July 19

It's always interesting to read the details of a "Name the Team" contest. I mean, we all know that they're bullshit intended to create publicity and that the votes rarely if ever actually determine the name the team is going to go with, but seeing what the rejected names were is usually a decent insight into the thought process the team went through.

And so it is with the El Paso Chihuahuas. The other names in the contest were Aardvarks, Buckaroos, Desert Gators, and Sun Dogs. A few things immediately leap out to me:

  • Most of these are bad names. Aardvarks are neither intimidating nor local to the El Paso area (they're native to central and southern Africa). Buckaroo is a word that probably hasn't been used unironically in the Third Millennium. Desert Gator is a made-up name, and it shows. Sun Dogs isn't a made-up name, but still sounds like one. Clearly they were trying to come up with names that were bad enough that it would be plausible for them to lose out to Chihuahuas.

  • The names are heavily stacked toward the beginning of the alphabet. I'm not sure why. I do know that many years ago I was helping someone name a new company he was starting, and one thing that was important to him was that the name come early in the alphabet so that people who were skimming through the yellow pages would find it. Of course, no one uses the yellow pages for anything anymore, and it's not like El Paso has a bunch of baseball teams such that this one needs to stand out from all the others. I'm not sure what the significance of this is (if indeed there is any), but it leapt out at me nonetheless.

  • I will at least grudgingly concede that the names are creative in the sense that they're not overused the way team names like Stars and Tiger are. Of course, the obvious counterargument is that there's a reason certain names are used more than others. Anyway, I found no instances of Aardvarks or Desert Gators, three instances of Buckaroos (two of which folded over a century ago, while the third folded in 1974), and two instances of Sundogs (although not Sun Dogs), both of them actually dating from this century.

  • Despite all of the above, you could still make a decent argument that they chose the worst of the bunch. I personally would put it in fourth out of the five (beating only Buckaroos), but since that name has actually been used a few times it must be a little better than I'm giving it credit for.

So having settled on the name by a vote that I'm absolutely sure was not rigged in any way whatsoever, the team set about choosing a logo. And the result was worthy of a team called the Chihuahuas. I've never owned a chihuahua myself (I prefer dogs that my cat won't confuse for a mouse), but several of my friends have, and to hear them tell it, all chihuahuas are insane. That's not the word they use, of course. They describe their chihuahuas as "full of attitude", "fierce", and the like. These are all euphemisms for "insane", of course. Nevertheless, this seems to be a standard trait in these dogs. (Given their size, I'm sure this is what's known in psychological circles as "compensating", but it's not like they asked to be born that small.) Anyway, the chihuahua in the logo seems to represent insanity quite well: a half-mad growl, a spiked collar, and demonic red eyes. He looks positively deranged, which is another word that none of my chihuahua-owning friends use to describe their pets even though it totally applies. Usually with a logo like this I'd say that it looks utterly ridiculous and because of that the logo is terrible. But in this case I think I have to say that the logo looks utterly ridiculous and because of that the logo is great. Whoever designed this logo has perfectly captured the very quintessence of a chihuahua. I don't think there's anything the logo designer could have done to make this a better logo. Except, maybe, convincing the team to pick a better name. But given the other options on the table, that clearly wasn't going to happen.

Final Score: 30 points.
Penalties: Humanoid, 30 pts. Bonuses: None.

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