Teams with asterisks are not yet posted

Aberdeen IronBirds
Acereros del Norte
Águila de Veracruz
Aigles de Trois-Rivières
Akron RubberDucks
Albuquerque Isotopes
Algodoneros de Unión Laguna
Altoona Curve
Amarillo Sod Poodles
Arkansas Travelers
Asheville Tourists
Augusta GreenJackets
Beloit Sky Carp*
Billings Mustangs
Biloxi Shuckers
Binghamton Rumble Ponies
Birmingham Barons
Boise Hawks
Bowie Baysox
Bowling Green Hot Rods
Bradenton Marauders
Bravos de León
Brooklyn Cyclones
Buffalo Bisons
Capitales de Quebec
Carolina Mudcats
Cedar Rapids Kernels
Charleston Dirty Birds
Charleston RiverDogs
Charlotte Knights
Charros de Jalisco*
Chattanooga Lookouts
Chicago Dogs
Clearwater Threshers
Cleburne Railroaders
Columbia Fireflies
Columbus Clippers
Conspiradores de Querétaro
Corpus Christi Hooks
Dayton Dragons
Daytona Tortugas
Delmarva Shorebirds
Diablos Rojos del México
Dorados de Chihuahua*
Down East Wood Ducks
Dunedin Blue Jays
Durham Bulls
El Paso Chihuahuas
Empire State Greys*
Erie SeaWolves
Eugene Emeralds
Evansville Otters*
Everett AquaSox
Fargo-Moorhead RedHawks
Fayetteville Woodpeckers
Florence Y'Alls
Fort Myers Mighty Mussels
Fort Wayne TinCaps
Fredericksburg Nationals
Fresno Grizzlies
Frisco RoughRiders
Gary SouthShore RailCats
Gastonia Baseball Club*
Gateway Grizzlies
Generales de Durango
Glacier Range Riders
Grand Junction Jackalopes
Great Falls Voyagers
Great Lakes Loons
Greensboro Grasshoppers*
Greenville Drive
Guerreros de Oaxaca
Gwinnett Stripers
Hagerstown Flying Boxcars*
Harrisburg Senators
Hartford Yard Goats
Hickory Crawdads
High Point Rockers
Hillsboro Hops
Hudson Valley Renegades
Idaho Falls Chukars
Indianapolis Indians
Inland Empire 66ers of San

Iowa Cubs
Jacksonville Jumbo Shrimp
Jersey Shore BlueClaws*
Joliet Slammers
Jupiter Hammerheads
Kannapolis Cannon Ballers
Kansas City Monarchs
Lake County Captains
Lake Country DockHounds
Lake Elsinore Storm
Lake Erie Crushers
Lakeland Flying Tigers
Lancaster Stormers*
Lansing Lugnuts
Las Vegas Aviators
Lehigh Valley IronPigs
Leones de Yucatán
Lexington Legends
Lincoln Saltdogs
Long Island Ducks
Louisville Bats
Lynchburg Hillcats
Memphis Redbirds
Midland RockHounds
Milwaukee Milkmen
Mississippi Braves
Missoula Paddleheads
Modesto Nuts
Montgomery Biscuits
Myrtle Beach Pelicans
Nashville Sounds
New England Knockouts
New Hampshire Fisher Cats
New Jersey Jackals
New York Boulders
Norfolk Tides
Northern Colorado Owlz
Northwest Arkansas Naturals*
Oakland Ballers
Ogden Raptors
Oklahoma City Baseball Club*
Olmecas de Tabasco
Omaha Storm Chasers
Ottawa Titans
Palm Beach Cardinals
Pensacola Blue Wahoos
Peoria Chiefs
Pericos de Puebla
Piratas de Campeche
Portland Sea Dogs
Quad City River Bandits
Rancho Cucamonga Quakes
Reading Fightin Phils
Reno Aces
Richmond Flying Squirrels
Rieleros de Aguascalientes
Rochester Red Wings
Rocket City Trash Pandas
Rocky Mountain Vibes
Rome Emperors*
Round Rock Express
Sacramento River Cats
Salem Red Sox
Salt Lake Bees
San Antonio Missions
San Jose Giants
Saraperos de Saltillo
Schaumburg Boomers
Scranton/Wilkes-Barre RailRiders
Sioux City Explorers
Sioux Falls Canaries
Somerset Patriots
South Bend Cubs
Southern Maryland Blue Crabs
Spokane Indians
Springfield Cardinals
St. Lucie Mets
St. Paul Saints
Staten Island FerryHawks
Stockton Ports
Sugar Land Skeeters
Sultanes de Monterrey
Sussex County Miners
Syracuse Mets
Tacoma Rainiers
Tampa Tarpons
Tecolotes de los Dos Laredos
Tennessee Smokies
Tigres de Quintana Roo
Toledo Mud Hens
Toros de Tijuana
Tri-City Dust Devils
Tri-City ValleyCats
Vancouver Canadians
Visalia Rawhide
Washington Wild Things
West Michigan Whitecaps
Wichita Wind Surge
Wilmington Blue Rocks
Windy City Thunderbolts
Winnipeg Goldeyes
Winston-Salem Dash
Wisconsin Timber Rattlers
Worcester Red Sox*
Yolo High Wheelers
York Revolution
Great Lakes Loons 243

Notice: All logos on this page are included within the parameters of 17 U.S.C. § 107, which states that the reproduction of a copyrighted work for purposes of criticism and/or comment is not an infringement of copyright. No challenge to the copyrights of these logos is intended by their inclusion here.
Posted 2014 July 3

It definitely takes some chutzpah to use Great Lakes as your locative when you play in the Midwest League. Ten of the twelve teams in the league play in a state that touches one of the Great Lakes, and an eleventh plays just over (and by "just over" I mean less than a thousand feet from) the state line dividing the state where the team plays from a state that touches one of them. If you were to draw the smallest possible circle that encompasses all of the Great Lakes, the entire league would be within that circle. This is the equivalent of a team in the National Football League called itself the United States [Nickname]. And obviously, since this is the Midwest League we're talking about, what I'm saying about this team has been true for its entire existence.

You might ask, why would a team do this? Well, you probably know how various regions come up with names to refer to the whole region that aren't simply "the [insert name of biggest city in the area] region". For example, the area around Tampa and St. Petersburg, Florida is "Tampa Bay". The area around Norfolk, Hampton, Newport News, and Virginia Beach, Virginia is "Hampton Roads". And so forth. Midland, Michigan (where the Loons play) is part of a region which used to be known as "Tri-Cities", but seeing as how there are roughly twenty other places in the U.S. known as the Tri-Cities, including one other in Michigan, the area around Midland (along with Saginaw and Bay City) has been trying to rebrand as "Great Lakes Bay". So in a way the name makes sense, if you overlook the fact that the team is called the Great Lakes Loons and not the Great Lakes Bay Loons. Also, the bay near the "Great Lakes Bay" region isn't called Great Lakes Bay, it's called Saginaw Bay. I suppose they didn't like that name for whatever reason, but "Great Lakes Bay" makes no sense. Saginaw Bay, incidentally, is the water feature that separates the "thumb" portion of the Lower Peninsula from the "fingers" part. And as it turns out, the area that corresponds to the "thumb" portion of the Lower Peninsula is known to locals as "The Thumb". Maybe the people in Saginaw, Midland, and Bay City could go with something similar. Or at least they could if they could figure out what the proper name of that fleshy little area between the thumb and the index finger is called. Because calling the region "That Fleshy Litle Area Between the Thumb and the Index Finger" isn't a very good name for a region. Although "Fleshy Little Area Between the Thumb and Index Finger Loons" does have a certain je ne sais quoi if you ask me.

You're probably looking at the logo and thinking that the designer was inspired after spending the weekend visiting a local art museum that was featuring an exhibit on Fauvism. Nope. It turns out that those colors are in fact accurate. Yes, loons' eyes really are red. Yes, loon's beaks really are grey. And yes, loons' necks really have vertical stripes. If there's anything inaccurate on the logo in terms of color, it's that the sky is green. But I have heard (fortunately I don't have firsthand experience) that the sky often turns green when there are tornados nearby. So maybe the sky is accurate, and any fans at the game need to take shelter now. (Do baseball stadiums in the Midwest have tornado shelters? In all seriousness it wouldn't surprise me.) The loon has an oddly confident smirk on his face that I don't know that loons are actually capable of, but we'll let that one slide, in part because that sort of thing is expected in sports logos and in part because I don't know that I've ever been within a hundred miles of a loon so for all I know they really do smirk like that.

But even if he is capable of it, why is he smirking like that?

Maybe he knows the proper name for that fleshy little area between the thumb and the idex finger, and he's amused that he knows that when he doesn't even have one while I'm wracking my brain trying to figure it out.

Final Score: 243 points.
Penalties: Region (tredecaply-egregious), 203 pts; Alliteration, 5 pts; Scenery, 11 pts; Humanoid (because of the eyes), 30 pts.
Bonuses: Local, -6 pts.

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