Teams with asterisks are not yet posted

Aberdeen IronBirds*
Acereros del Norte
Águila de Veracruz
Aigles de Trois-Rivières
Akron RubberDucks
Albuquerque Isotopes
Algodoneros de Unión Laguna
Altoona Curve
Amarillo Sod Poodles
Arkansas Travelers
Asheville Tourists
Augusta GreenJackets
Beloit Sky Carp*
Billings Mustangs
Biloxi Shuckers
Binghamton Rumble Ponies
Birmingham Barons
Boise Hawks
Bowie Baysox
Bowling Green Hot Rods
Bradenton Marauders
Bravos de León
Brooklyn Cyclones
Buffalo Bisons
Capitales de Quebec
Carolina Mudcats
Cedar Rapids Kernels
Charleston Dirty Birds
Charleston RiverDogs
Charlotte Knights
Charros de Jalisco*
Chattanooga Lookouts
Chicago Dogs
Clearwater Threshers
Cleburne Railroaders
Columbia Fireflies
Columbus Clippers
Conspiradores de Querétaro
Corpus Christi Hooks
Dayton Dragons
Daytona Tortugas
Delmarva Shorebirds
Diablos Rojos del México
Dorados de Chihuahua*
Down East Wood Ducks
Dunedin Blue Jays
Durham Bulls
El Paso Chihuahuas
Empire State Greys*
Erie SeaWolves
Eugene Emeralds
Evansville Otters*
Everett AquaSox
Fargo-Moorhead RedHawks
Fayetteville Woodpeckers
Florence Y'Alls
Fort Myers Mighty Mussels
Fort Wayne TinCaps
Fredericksburg Nationals
Fresno Grizzlies
Frisco RoughRiders
Gary SouthShore RailCats
Gastonia Baseball Club*
Gateway Grizzlies
Generales de Durango
Glacier Range Riders
Grand Junction Jackalopes
Great Falls Voyagers
Great Lakes Loons*
Greensboro Grasshoppers*
Greenville Drive
Guerreros de Oaxaca
Gwinnett Stripers
Hagerstown Flying Boxcars*
Harrisburg Senators
Hartford Yard Goats
Hickory Crawdads
High Point Rockers
Hillsboro Hops
Hudson Valley Renegades
Idaho Falls Chukars
Indianapolis Indians
Inland Empire 66ers of San

Iowa Cubs
Jacksonville Jumbo Shrimp
Jersey Shore BlueClaws*
Joliet Slammers
Jupiter Hammerheads
Kannapolis Cannon Ballers
Kansas City Monarchs
Lake County Captains
Lake Country DockHounds
Lake Elsinore Storm
Lake Erie Crushers
Lakeland Flying Tigers
Lancaster Stormers*
Lansing Lugnuts
Las Vegas Aviators
Lehigh Valley IronPigs
Leones de Yucatán
Lexington Legends
Lincoln Saltdogs
Long Island Ducks
Louisville Bats
Lynchburg Hillcats
Memphis Redbirds
Midland RockHounds
Milwaukee Milkmen
Mississippi Braves
Missoula Paddleheads
Modesto Nuts
Montgomery Biscuits
Myrtle Beach Pelicans
Nashville Sounds
New England Knockouts*
New Hampshire Fisher Cats
New Jersey Jackals
New York Boulders
Norfolk Tides
Northern Colorado Owlz
Northwest Arkansas Naturals*
Oakland Ballers
Ogden Raptors
Oklahoma City Baseball Club*
Olmecas de Tabasco
Omaha Storm Chasers
Ottawa Titans
Palm Beach Cardinals
Pensacola Blue Wahoos
Peoria Chiefs
Pericos de Puebla
Piratas de Campeche
Portland Sea Dogs
Quad City River Bandits
Rancho Cucamonga Quakes
Reading Fightin Phils
Reno Aces
Richmond Flying Squirrels
Rieleros de Aguascalientes
Rochester Red Wings
Rocket City Trash Pandas
Rocky Mountain Vibes
Rome Emperors*
Round Rock Express
Sacramento River Cats
Salem Red Sox
Salt Lake Bees
San Antonio Missions
San Jose Giants
Saraperos de Saltillo
Schaumburg Boomers
Scranton/Wilkes-Barre RailRiders
Sioux City Explorers
Sioux Falls Canaries
Somerset Patriots
South Bend Cubs
Southern Maryland Blue Crabs
Spokane Indians
Springfield Cardinals
St. Lucie Mets
St. Paul Saints
Staten Island FerryHawks
Stockton Ports
Sugar Land Skeeters
Sultanes de Monterrey
Sussex County Miners
Syracuse Mets
Tacoma Rainiers
Tampa Tarpons
Tecolotes de los Dos Laredos
Tennessee Smokies
Tigres de Quintana Roo
Toledo Mud Hens
Toros de Tijuana
Tri-City Dust Devils
Tri-City ValleyCats
Vancouver Canadians
Visalia Rawhide
Washington Wild Things
West Michigan Whitecaps
Wichita Wind Surge
Wilmington Blue Rocks
Windy City Thunderbolts
Winnipeg Goldeyes
Winston-Salem Dash
Wisconsin Timber Rattlers
Worcester Red Sox*
Yolo High Wheelers
York Revolution
Greensboro Grasshoppers 146

Notice: All logos on this page are included within the parameters of 17 U.S.C. § 107, which states that the reproduction of a copyrighted work for purposes of criticism and/or comment is not an infringement of copyright. No challenge to the copyrights of these logos is intended by their inclusion here.
Posted 2009 July 18

Baseball, having a much longer tradition of professional play than football or basketball, has a lot of teams whose nicknames developed "organically", by which I mean they are true nicknames chosen by fans or reporters and adopted by the team instead of being deliberately chosen by the team for marketing reasons. Organic names tend to be a bit more colorful for that very reason. Nobody in Brooklyn sat around and decided that "Trolley Dodgers" would be a good name for marketing purposes. Nobody in Philadelphia thought that "Phillies" would cause opponents to tremble in fear. The people in Toledo didn't think — well, based on the handful of people from Toledo that I've met, maybe they did think "Mud Hens" would be good marketing, but I can't rule out the possibility that their name was organic, as well. As a general rule, I prefer these more colorful nicknames over the slick, chosen-to-sell-T-shirts names you see in other sports such as Houston Rockets or Colorado Mammoth. So even if I find a name like "Sioux Falls Canaries" is a bit odd, I can appreciate the fact that the name has history behind it and deserves a little slack. But what to make of a name like "Greensboro Grasshoppers"? It clearly looks like one of those organic names. It clearly isn't a name deliberately chosen for its marketability. Or is it? The name has no history whatsoever; it only dates back to 2005. Simply put, any name used for the first time these days is being chosen for its marketability, even if it doesn't look like it. At first blush, it would seem that the owners were complete idiots who thought a name like "Grasshoppers" would be trendy the way that monikers like "RailCats" are. But after thinking about it, I think this is the nickname equivalent of Camden Yards. It's brand new, but deliberately designed to evoke the quirkiness of yesteryear.

I have no idea what to think of this. Part of me likes it: I like a certain amount of character, and "Grasshoppers" is certainly a better name than "RailCats". But at the same time, I feel like I'm being blatantly manipulated. I'm sure they're hoping people will think this is a quirky name which has a connection to some team that played in Greensboro back in 1902 or something. It's almost, but not quite, lying to me. Nobody appreciates being lied to. There is undeniably a certain charm in the "Grasshoppers" name, but that charm is weakened by the blatancy of it all.

This isn't the first time they've done that, incidentally. Their previous name was the Greensboro Bats. Again, there's an obvious charm to such a name in baseball. And, again, it's so obvious that it undermines itself. If they change their name again, they're really going to need to work on that.

And then there's the logo. As you can see, the logo appears to be trying to have it both ways. The word "Grasshoppers" is written in that special script you never see anywhere but baseball teams and junior high schools. But the grasshopper itself is pure trendy cheese. It's a weird mutant grasshopper/baseball player, made all the more ridiculous by the fact that the legs are pencil-thin compared to the arms (arms which, let me point out, even Barry "BALCO" Bonds would be jealous of). Overall, the effect is of a junior high school that got a particularly talented student to design their logo. That's not a compliment, in case you're wondering.

And speaking of junior high, this would be a terrible name for any junior-high school team to actually use. Any junior high student is bound to immediately notice the thing that I immediately noticed when I first looked at the logo: that you can cover the first two letters of the name and you're left with "asshoppers". I'm not sure why I first noticed this — something about the script in the logo, perhaps — but ever since I did, I've been unable to look at the name or logo without thinking of that. Now I can't look at the logo without snickering. And neither can you. I can only wonder whether the fans in Greensboro have noticed yet. Maybe I should go to a game (it's only an hour and a half away) and see. If they announce a Seventh-Inning Snicker instead of a Seventh-Inning Stretch, I'll have my answer.

Final Score: 146 points.
Penalties: Alliteration (egregious), 11 pts; Script, 7 pts; Humanoid, 30 pts; Cartoon, 47 pts; Player, 51 pts. Bonuses: None.

This page Copyright ©2009 Scott D. Rhodes. All rights reserved