Teams with asterisks are not yet posted

Aberdeen IronBirds
Acereros del Norte*
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Akron RubberDucks
Albuquerque Isotopes
Alexandria Aces*
Algodoneros de Unión Laguna*
Altoona Curve
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Arkansas Travelers
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Bay Area Toros*
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Bradenton Marauders
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Frederick Keys
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Generales de Durango*
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New Orleans Baby Cakes 154

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Posted 2019 May 23

You don't need to read this review to know I think this is a ridiculous name. Baby Cakes. FFS, people. I could truly make some choice comments about this name if I felt like it. But what I would have to say is nothing compared to this letter to the editor I found complaining about the team: "[The owners] clearly demonstrated their utter lack of regard for this community and for the game of baseball when they adopted the most demeaning, the most nonsensical, and the least authentic nickname they could have come up with. It wasn't even a part of our community's well-known idiosyncratic idiom."

The name comes from a particular New Orleans tradition (or more accurately, New Orleans' version of a tradition which can be found all over the Western world) wherein a cake is baked with a small, plastic baby inside. Depending on who you ask, this baby either represents the baby Jesus, or has absolutely nothing to do with baby Jesus and who the hell came up with that represents-the-baby-Jesus idea anyway and would you please quit repeating it because it's utter bullshit. From what I've gathered, people take this a bit too seriously. I'm hardly an expert in New Orleans culture, but I will note that one generally sees these cakes around Mardi Gras, which isn't exactly a holiday related to the birth of the Christ. On the other hand, in other parts of the world this cake is baked and eaten around Epiphany, which is related to the birth of the Christ.

This cake, incidentally, is not called a baby cake. It's called a king cake. Thus the letter writer's complaint about the nickname not being authentic. Apparently one of the traditions related to the cake is that whoever finds the baby (properly known as a fève, incidentally) is declared "king" or "queen" for the evening. Speaking as someone who has a friend from Louisiana and thus gets to eat a king cake every year (the friend brings it to the Game Night closest to Mardi Gras), I can tell you that being declared "king" doesn't amount to much. One year I was supposed to be king, but when I lost a game of Ticket to Ride and responded by ordering the winner be beheaded, my orders were roundly ignored by everyone else. Another tradition is that whoever is declared king is supposed to bring the king cake next time, but fortunately I was spared that because the Louisiana friend is the only one who knows which New Orleans bakery he orders the cakes from.

Anyway, as I write this it's not clear there's even going to be a New Orleans Baby Cakes next year. The AAA team is moving to Wichita. I've read in numerous places that the owners are going to obtain a Southern League franchise and move it to New Orleans. But it hasn't been announced anywhere who that Southern League franchise is, and I'm not clear on whether this is a done deal or just something the owners are trying to put together. Also, if it does happen, it's not clear whether the Southern League team will keep the Baby Cakes name.

Frankly, I hope not.

Final Score: 120 points.
Penalties: Compound, 34 pts; Cartoon, 47 pts; Player, 51 pts; Name, 10 pts; Logo, 12 pts.
Bonuses: None.

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